This is the first post I’ve written since July. Everything over the past 11 weeks has been the work of some incredible friends who offered to help as I recovered from brain surgery.
Getting back into the swing of things has been challenging. I spent 15 days in the hospital and inpatient rehab. Once I got home, I struggled with the side effects of surgery: some facial paralysis, double vision, and overwhelming fatigue. All have gotten better, and I started working again about a month ago.
At first, working was incredibly difficult. My neck would get sore (from a long incision behind my ear where I had my craniotomy). My eyes got tired. I had to take frequent breaks, which interrupted my flow. Work took me much longer than it had before surgery.
That’s gotten better, but I now struggle with something else: reclaiming my drive. Client work aside, I spent a lot of time and energy on free resources for fellow solopreneurs. This work brought me joy. And I think it can again someday, but right now it feels overwhelming.
Part of that is due to how long everything takes me. But also, I feel like these past few months have given me a break that I haven’t had for most of my adult life. I was married at 22. Had a baby at 25 and another baby at 28. Lost two babies and faced grief I didn’t even know was possible. Finally welcomed my rainbow baby in 2017. Locked down tight with my family during Covid in 2020 and 2021. Changed careers. Lost my job in 2022 and started my own business. And it has been nonstop ever since.
During my recovery, other people were taking care of me, versus the other way around. I was supposed to rest, but rest felt very unnerving. I’ve never sat still that long in my entire life. Weeks of lying in bed. I couldn’t read because of headaches and double vision. I could listen to audiobooks, podcasts, and TV shows, but I fell asleep so easily. I figured out a way to dictate blog posts and get them published, but I didn’t do much of that since I was so tired all the time. I felt like a useless lump.
And now I wonder if there is some kind of middle ground... something in between the nonstop of my prior life and the standstill of my recovery time. A place where creative work can exist that is only for me and not for clients or an audience. I don’t yet know what that looks like.
While I was recovering, I saw an Instagram post from a creator that said, “If your income stops when you stop, you don’t run a business, you run a job.”
And I thought, “That simply feeds hustle culture and that every moment of our lives has to be spent earning money.“ We can’t ever take time to recover from major life events.
Side hustles.
Recurring revenue.
Passive income.
I’ve written about this before, as a way to protect oneself in an uncertain economy, but specifically in the context that we shouldn’t need a side hustle. Yet I also recognize the precariousness and financial implications of stepping back from work.
My income stopped — completely — for two months. I’m fortunate that I was able to do that without stress. But that wasn’t a failure on my part to build a self-sustaining business. Many, many self-employed people run programs like coaching or advising or design that are 100% dependent on their own skills.
I’ve thought many times about building things that could generate recurring revenue: self-paced courses, membership communities, paid digital products. But that type of work takes a lot of hustle, to build an audience that can support it. The risks are even bigger when the “face” of the products steps back from the business (like recovering from major surgery). And I’m no longer sure that’s what I want to pursue. I’ve always wanted to write a book, for example, but never had the time and space to really focus on it. Now I wonder if I should make the time.
Of course, I write this a mere eleven weeks out from surgery. Who knows how I’ll feel in the coming months. But it’s interesting how we re-consider our priorities and ask ourselves, “Am I really doing what I want to be doing?”
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I definitely think it's time for your book. I think it will be well received and a huge sell for you. Especially out on LinkedIn when it is released. I know I'd buy a copy and probably a few to give to others Anna. I'd make sure that folks at UUSG buy it as well.